The forgotten gift of service of the military child

By: Sue Wilson, American Red Cross Volunteer

When most of us think of military service, the first thing that comes to mind is the men and women in uniform who selflessly chose to serve our country. We pass them in public places, and thank them for their service. We understand that when they take the oath, they do so knowing they’ll be away from their families, work long, hard hours to complete their mission, and always, they risk injury or death. But what we don’t often think of is the sacrifice made by the children in military families, and that they, too are deserving of our appreciation.

April is the month of the Military Child, and the American Red Cross is honoring special individuals who were born into a life a service by the decision a parent made to serve our country, and the extra special ones who have used the unique challenges of their childhood to serve others in a special way.

Red Cross volunteer Zoë Day is one such person. Both her mom and dad served 20+years in the Army. Zoë is currently on the Service to Armed Forces Team for the Northeast Ohio chapter, while pursuing a Master’s Degree in Social Work.

Being a military kid is not always easy. They experience multiple moves, schools, interruptions of friendships, parental separation and always, a fear of the risk their parents service entails. Zoë has moved 7 times, and lived in places as varied as Anchorage, Alaska, San Juan, Puerto Rico, and her favorite, Fort Jackson, SC. She believes that while her many moves have presented challenges, she’s learned useful life skills. “I’ve developed a thick skin when it comes to daily stressors,” says Zoë. “Being a military brat taught me how to feel at ease in any environment and adapt, despite quick changes and challenges. I’ve learned resilience and a sense of fortitude, a ‘get the job done’ attitude.”

Zoë’s supervisor. Jessica Tischler, Regional Program Director of Service to the Armed Forces, believes it is that attitude that makes Zoë so valuable. “Zoe’s background as the child of military parents gives her a sensitivity to the needs of service men and women, veterans and their families,” she said. “We are so fortunate that she is lending her talents as a volunteer to our Service to the Armed Forces casework.”

Friendships are another unique challenge facing military kids. “I am so used to moving that it is hard to keep in contact with old friends and try to make new ones at the same time,” Zoë said. The Covid-19 pandemic hasn’t made that part any easier for the kids of military families.

Zoë said that one of the benefits of being a military kid is that her family likes to explore the state they are in and enjoy that region’s culture as much as possible. She said the virus has given everyone cabin fever, forcing us to be resourceful. This is true of other military kids, too.

“My friends, also mainly military brats, have struggled as their usual way to enjoy life is related to traveling to visit each other in new states, and continuing the tradition of seeing new places every so often. These trips are now facetime bound,” says Zoë

Zoë is currently pursuing her master’s degree in social work while she interns at the Red Cross. Did she ever consider following in her parent’s footsteps? “I thought I would, then I realized my passion lies in supporting those who have protected our country either by serving directly or by being their support system during duty. I see myself getting to know the military veteran and family population a lot better by being a boots-on-the-ground social advocate and fighting for their social-welfare.”

Zoë Day, the Red Cross salutes you, and offers a collective “Thank You” for YOUR service.”

Show your support: Since 1900, the American Red Cross has been entrusted by Federal Charter with providing care and support for our military. Your support enables us to continue this proud tradition for our military and their families. Learn more, and donate here.

Military Dad Honors Military Children

April is Month of the Military Child

By Jorge Martinez, Chief Operating Officer, American Red Cross, Northeast Ohio Region
Commander, United States Coast Guard (Retired)

Jorge

Jorge Martinez

Military members past and present are routinely honored throughout any given year in many ways, and rightfully so.  As a retired military officer, I can say that I feel more than adequately recognized for my service to our wonderful country.  Truth be told and as any member will tell you – it’s not why we serve.  And while not necessary it is appreciated.  However, it is not the individual that serves, but rather the family.  And most members will tell you that the service member has the easy job.

That was certainly true for me.

I would deploy for months on end carrying out the king’s work with people I loved and trusted while my family stayed back and did their valiant best to go on with life as normal — though always worrying but not showing it.  They too were serving honorably but doing so silently in the shadows.

I would get painful glimpses from time to time.

I remember one particular instance nearly 10 years ago when I was putting my then 6-year old son, Ben, on the school bus before heading out to sea myself for nearly 5 months.  He was the last of my two sons to head out that morning; my infant daughter was still asleep in her crib.

Ben was and is a very stoic kid.  Though we were very close, he never showed his emotion and I know he never wanted to disappoint me.  I hugged him when I put him on the bus and told him I loved him.  He sat in a window seat… and gave me a look that I will never forget.  It was a “you’re leaving me again, Dad” type of look and it cut right through me.  As soon as the bus pulled away, I hugged my wife and we both started to cry.  This was not an isolated incident.

Military families and their selfless service to our nation are all too often overlooked, especially the children’s service and sacrifice.  They go about their days like any other kid would and typically without complaint about a parent being gone for long periods of time.  They keep it together most of the time.  They didn’t ask for this, but deal with it they must and do.  It’s hard and it’s thankless… but it’s necessary.

Military children are my heroes!  They have a wonderful purpose and possess such quiet strength.  After retirement, I’ve been able to reflect on them and their journey of service and it’s an inspiring one to me.  Throughout my career, I have been blessed to be part of many great teams that have accomplished much.  But my greatest accomplishment (really my wife’s) is seeing my children grow up and be better than I ever could have been at their stage of life.

Our country’s military children have been inspiring and helping our military members for as long as we’ve been a country.  Our nation owes them a debt of gratitude.  If you agree, next time you see a military family thank them all… especially the children.  They’ve earned it.

The American Red Cross supports our nation’s military members, veterans, and their families through Service to the Armed Forces.  Learn more here.